Showing posts with label Geek. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Geek. Show all posts

Monday, April 20, 2009

The Palaeontologist’s muse

There are two types of forces in the world. There are the explosive, fast forces like volcanoes, earthquakes and thermonuclear fusion weapons. And then there are the slow ones – the rivers that cleave mountains and the seas which batter entire land-masses into submission. In our brief, fleeting, lives we tend to recognise the fast shapers as superior in some way. But take a look at the Grand Canyon or the Himalayas – they were shaped over thousands of years (by water erosion and tectonic plates moving against each other respectively) by the slow powers that be.

The process of science parallels this aspect of nature. There are the moments of extreme insight – the ‘eureka’ moments where we make giant strides in fleeting instants. And then there is the slow process of chipping away at the barriers nature places between us and knowledge. Where we batter down the obstacles we face and achieve our ends inches at a time. This post is dedicated to that inexorable movement. For though the sprint may get us over a hill, it is the march that moves armies over continents.

I mentioned in ‘Our little friends to be’ that I’d spent the winter (of 08-09) in the US. I stayed in Washington DC for the entirety of that trip (except for two awesome days in New York). And as any geek worthy of that title would have done, I spent more than a few days running around the Smithsonian(s) grinning in delight. They weren’t as great as I thought they would be. Don’t get me wrong, they were brilliant. But they seemed to fall a way short of expectation – the dinosaurs didn’t seem as big and the sabre-toothed cats not as menacing as I thought they would in my imagination. But a few parts stood out. One of them, in the palaeontology section is what’s inspiring this post:

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They had this glass room in which the palaeontologists who prepared the fossils worked. You could watch them work like any other exhibit at the museum. The room was brightly lit and the hallway outside quite dark. So, I guess, to someone inside it would seem like the quiet labs they were used to. People knocking on the glass, however, might’ve be a problem. But the hilarious sign I’ve photographed above seemed to stop most of that!

A palaeontologist digs up fossils. Fossils can be pretty large – the fully preserved hip of a brachiosaur for example. But I’m given to believe that most are small – teeth, bone fragments and the like. In any case, Palaeontologists dig them up and clean them with instruments like toothbrushes (only for heavy duty work!), paint brushes and other stuff like that. Imagine the patience it takes to sit in the mid-day heat of a desert and dig out a five tonne piece of mineralised bone embedded 20 meters up a cliff-face with a fine sable! What madness drives them!?! But scientists and engineers do that all the time. We seldom rely on leaps of intuition.

There are hundreds of famous examples of this in the history of science. Men and Women have so often made thousands of models and millions of calculations before they got things right. I myself have spent weeks varying values in a circuit trying to find an optimal configuration.

But the effort is almost always worth it. Look around you. Look at that plane overhead or the cell phone you hold in your hand. They almost surely took a massive effort to design and build. But ask an engineer who creates them or a scientist who discovers the principles they rely on and they’ll tell you that the sheer joy of seeing their work come alive is worth every drop of sweat and ever hour lost in thought.

I know this joy. And I suspect almost every creator of things does too. It is our reason. It is the thing that binds us to our lab-benches and drives us. It is our muse. The muse that inspires the palaeontologist within us all to chip away at his problem one layer of dirt at a time.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Meet thy maker

“Prepare to meet thy maker!”. You must have heard that phrase somewhere (Or at least its less cool, non Dog-Latin equivalent: Prepare to meet your maker). Most likely in one of those terrible Jean Claude Van Damme movies we all bitch about in respectable company but watch in secrecy (and, need it be said, extreme boredom). Well, in any case, what does it really mean? How the hell [pun not intended……. at first :) ] do you prepare for something as weird as that? No, that’s just silly! And I am not going to waste anyone’s time by filling out the rest of this post with step by step advice on doing the same. i.e. nothing like- ‘#42: In front of Him, another layer of deo just won’t cut it. Better break out the soap’. No, this is about small disasters. The things that make you fell you have to prepare to meet your maker. In particular, two that struck me like a large plate of expensive noodles. With meatballs.*

Now, what is a small disaster? ‘Small disaster’! Its almost an oxymoron! Well, a small disaster is something that really, really sucks. It won’t, by definition, matter at all in the long run and it usually doesn’t affect the world at large, just a few people, maybe you and a few friends, who think similar. A small disaster is your favourite book store closing down, Its finding out that the flavour of ice cream you love will no longer be made or that the bookmark you’ve used for twenty seven years will be kitty litter in a few hours. Its the thing that makes you feel that the world’s ending now. When in reality, all you really need to do is look in the mirror (and if your head works anything like mine, laugh your guts out at the sorry figure you see), take a deep breadth and get on with the business of living.

So what happened to me? What could’ve possibly made me write this post? Well, first, you need a lil background. See, I’m what you call a geek (Gee, what was your first clue?). I live by the stylus on my PDA and on the mind-numbing uberness of the interweb. I am also a rather ordered geek (read the post titled ‘The hammer of order’ for more on that). I like my email, tasks, contacts, etc etc to stay in sync. I also need my mobile internet access (I’m the kind of guy who thinks Google-stalking you is easier than just asking you what you do. And did I mention more fun – chances are, someone’s uploaded that old Vegas vid on YouTube!). And I had it all! Airtel’s dirt cheap ‘Mobile Office’ data plan was perfect for me- 75 Rupees a week and I had unlimited net access wherever I went! And then there was the free hosted exchange by the nice people at mail2web. That allowed me to keep everything in sync, let me access anything I wanted from anywhere and was really, really easy to use on my WinMO PDA.

Then they died. The exchange service was the first to go. The mail2web people wanted to upgrade their software to match Microsoft's latest version (Which, according to Bill’s marketing department was just a little bit better than FSM* heaven) and ended up running balls-first into a wall of licence agreements. The result? They couldn’t let the service be free even if they wanted to! (And you thought Gates had idiots working for him before huh?). So they pulled the plug on that nice slice of heaven and decided to charge for the stuff that I’d been enjoying for all of zero. Dealing with that blow wasn’t actually that bad, not compared to what’s happened now, but I digress – my exchange died and all was smote in its ruin. (According to Tolkien that means “things were f**ked up cause it went bust”). So, I dealt with it. I shifted back to the windows live ‘push’ service Microsoft offers for free (and which is nowhere near as good as exchange) and came up with an ad-hock way of backing up and accessing my stuff online: Microsoft’s ‘My Phone’. It took patience, some surgery and a little fiddling around but it seems to work for the large part.

And then Airtel went and decided that a freakin’ duck would make good VP of marketing material (I think they thought a quack would lend them more credibility with the Godman demographic). They went and discontinued the entire mobile office scheme. And replaced it with a charge of 30p for every 50kb transferred. Read those lines and weep ye! 30p for every 50kb! That's bad by the standards they had in biblical times (Imagine John trying to publish to ‘http://bible.blogspot.com’** and running into repeated 404s)!

I’m dealing with that disaster as we speak. I have opera mini set up as my default browser (all tricked out to reduce usage). My email is configured to arrive only at certain hours of the day and It doesn’t download anything but the text. I also have a connection monitor in place that warns me if I use too much. But its hard, I’m dealing with it one day at a time. Wish me luck. Or better yet, wish Airtel luck. I’m going to go after them with stuff covered in cool yellow-and-black hazard signs.

peace….. Unless you work for Airtel

*FSM, noodles, Meatballs etc. I hope you know I’m referring to the church of the flying spaghetti monster.

**I think there is actually a blog by that title. I haven’t seen it and have nothing to do with it.

PS: bout all the weird religion references…. well, I had to tie the post to the title (liked it, didn’t want to change it) somehow right?